Josh References
The Technical Guide to Assembler Languages

Many Computer Scientists have discovered a definite lack of computational power in most modern machines. Often one simple command could eliminate large, bulky routines. A number of fellow scientists have proposed the following list of "additional" commands that (we feel) would tremendously expand the scope and power of the typical computer. These instructions are given with easy-to-remember mnemonics for quick addition to a macro library or instruction set.

AAC
Alter All Commands
AAR
Alter At Random
AB
Add Backwards
AFVC
Add Finagle's Variable Constant
AIB
Attack Innocent Bystander
AWTT
Assemble With Tinker Toys
BAC
Branch to Alpha Centauri
BAF
Blow All Fuses
BCIL
Branch Creating Infinite Loop
BDC
Break Down and Cry
BDT
Burn Data Tree
BF
Belch Five
BW
Branch on Whim
CBNC
Close, But No Cigar
CH
Crete Havoc
CMD
Compare Meaningless Data
CML
Compute Meaning of Life
CNB
Cause Nervous Breakdown
COLB
Crash for Operator's Lunch Break
CRASH
Continue Running After Stop or Halt
CS
Crash System
CSL
Curse and Sweal Loudly
CVG
Convert to Garbage
DBZ
Divide By Zero
DDC
Daily During Calculations
DLN
Don't Look Now...
DMPE
Decide to Major in Physical Education
DOC
Drive Operator Crazy
DPMI
Declare Programmer Mentally Incompetent
DPR
Destroy Program
DTC
Destroy This Command
DTVFL
Destroy Third Variable From Left
DW
Destroy World
DWIM
Do What I Mean
ECO
Electrocute Computer Operator
EIAO
Execute In Any Order
ENF
Emit Noxious Fumes
EOI
Execute Operator Immediately
EP
Execute Programmer
FLI
Flash Lights Impressively
FSM
Fold, Spindle, and Mutilate
GCAR
Get Correct Answer Regardless
GDP
Grin Defiantly at Programmer
HCF
Halt and Catch Fire
HCP
Hide Central Processor
ISC
Insert Sarcastic Comments
JTZ
Jump to Twilight Zone
LAP
Laugh at Program(mer)
LPA
Lead Programmer Astray
MAZ
Multiply Answer by Zero
MW
Malfunction Whenever
MWT
Malfunction Without Telling
OML
Obey Murphy's Laws
PEHC
Punch Extra Holes in Cards
PNRP
Print Nasty Replies to Programmer
RA
Randomize Answer
RCB
Read Commands Backwards
RDA
Refuse to Disclose Answer
RLI
Rotate Left Indefinitely
RPM
Read Programmer's Mind
RRSGWSSNK
Round and Round She Goes, Where She Stops, Nobody Knows
SAI
Skip All Instructions
SCCA
Short Circuit on Correct Answer
SFH
Set Flags to Half-mast
SFT
Stall For Time
SOS
Sign Off, Stupid
SRDR
Shift Right, Double Ridiculous
TARC
Take Arithmetic Review Course
TLO
Turn Indicator Lights Off
TN
Take a Nap
TPDH
Tell Programmer to Do it Him/Herself
TTA
Try Try Again
UP
Understand Program
WSWW
Work in Strange and Wondrous Ways


Back to my reference page
Back to my home page

Last update Apr24/02 by Josh Simon (<jss@clock.org>).